My wife's mother is not accepting the validity of our marriage

My wife's mother is not accepting the validity of our marriageCategory: WomenMy wife's mother is not accepting the validity of our marriage
Jacob Seim asked 4 years ago

Asalamu AAlaykum, thank you for taking my question and may Allah reward you for your efforts. I am an American revert and my wife was raised in a family in which her father is a non muslim and her mother is someone who had left islam, coming back to it Alhahmdulillah a few years before I met my wife. I live in Phoenix, my wife lives in Los Angeles. We met on a muslim matrimonial app and we pray that Allah will make the circumstances easier to facilitate my wife’s relocation. The main obstacle in doing so is my status with my wife’s mother. The relationship between my wife’s mother and I was great in the beginning. She was overly kind in her approval of marrying her daughter and she was there in the masjid when my wife and I signed our contract in the presence of the prescribed witnesses. That was before we went on vacation together. Her mother is currently in a state of not recognizing the validity of the marriage between myself and her daughter. On a bus in Tunisia, her home country, my wife and I, out of fear of missing the thuhur prayer window, prayed in our seats. (her mother was in a different seat in front of us with her non muslim friend). Upon arrival to our destination, she called us to pray thuhur with her and my wife informed her that we had done so on the bus. This turned into a situation in which my wife and her mother began to argue because she didn’t feel it was appropriate for us to have prayed on the bus. I walked out of our room into the courtyard and gestured for my wife to follow me to our room to stop the heated nature of things. Upon seeing me, my wife’s mother began a verbal assault on me, the severity and specificity of which I don’t feel are appropriate to share. After things had cooled down, I apologized for interfering. Although she said that she didn’t want to look at me and that she didn’t want to talk about it, initially she assured me of forgiveness. However the next day the friend of her mother who was staying with us told me that she was asking me to leave Tunisia and go home a week earlier than originally planned. After insisting on trying to make things work, she insisted upon my departure, using her friend as her representative, not asking me directly. My wife tried to talk to her but to no avail. So I obliged and came home early with the hope of things blowing over but it has been almost 2 months now since they came home and she does not want to accept me. My wife reports that she gets extremely upset if my wife tries to talk to me on the phone or if I am even brought up in conversation. Even if I were to drive to LA, she would prevent my wife from seeing me. Ultimately because of this, my wofe and i are both suffering from missing each other and my wife is suffering more because she is caught in the middle. She loves her mother very much and wants to avoid confrontstion at all costs. My wife does believe that her mother is being unfair but again she fears dishonoring her. What should I do? What should my wife do? Please help and advise of the best steps that we can take in this situation in shaa Allah. Jazakh Allah khair for taking the time to read and help me in this time of trial. Asalamu AAlaykum wa rahmatallahi wa barakatuh.