My name is Sally and I’m writing you to kindly ask you about a confusion I have. I am 26 years old, originally from Iraq. My Father, who was my best friend and greatest support, passed away about a year ago. Had he been here, I wouldn’t be in this position.
There’s a Christian Venezuelan man whom I have known more than 15 years. He’s my brother’s best friend and almost like a son to my parents. My family has always loved him and never had a problem with him. He recently got divorced and doesn’t have kids. However, we have come to realize that we have a lot of things in common. He has been very interested in Islam and I have been helping him learn about it as much as possible. He is willing to convert to Islam as soon as we decide to get married. My mother and brother did not have a problem in the beginning and they supported me. However, once I let my mom know that it was very serious, she completely changed her mind; not because he’s not a Muslim, but because of his current financial situation, which is not that “good”. However, my standards of living are very different from my mother’s. I am a very simple person who doesn’t ask for much and we were planning to get married some time in the near future when his financial situation improves. However, my mother pressured my brother to talk to his best friend and tell him to completely forget about me. She told him that it was an impossible thing to ever happen. Even my brother changed his opinion suddenly just because of my mother’s pressure on him. I have become extremely depressed because he is indeed a good man with a great heart and is very kind, respectful, and loving towards his mother. He has nothing, but good and serious intentions with me. I am also sure that if my Father were still alive, he would have my back and would support me because my Father wants my happiness more than anything and he absolutely loves the man in question. I had my uncle and aunt speak to my mother and try to change her point of view, but she doesn’t even want to discuss the possibility of it. I thought she would negotiate certain terms with me after seeing how depressed I am, but nothing really moves her at this point.
I apologize for the lengthy explanation, but I have become truly alone without my Father and I really wish to marry this man. Could you please guide me on Islam’s point of view on such a case and what I should do?
Jazzak Allah kheir. May Allah protect you from harm and always increase you in knowledge.