I’ve heard of the hadith about how the people who did sins in secret will have their good deeds disappear like husks of rice on the day of judgement. I’m sorry if this is uncomfortable to anyone, but I’m addicted to self-harm. I don’t do it every chance I get when I’m alone, but I do do it sometimes. Point is, I’m not sure if I did think of Allah when doing it, but if I did my good deeds would all do away. But in my duaas, I ask Allah to forgive me for everything I have done in the past and not any specific sin, and I’m not exactly guilty towards what I do. So will He forgive me or no? Also, is there a specific punishment for this deed? And if you repent, will all your good deeds come back or do you have to start all over again?