Husband and wife

Husband and wifeCategory: RelationshipsHusband and wife
Naila asked 2 years ago

Asalamalikum, I have a question in regards to my martial life. My husband and i got married through marriage. I was previously married before this i had no plans to get married but he promised me to respect me value me and not treat me differently due to my past. His family was against it due to my previous marriage so he then he married me behind their backs we tied our nikah. My family accepted from my side. Long story short he has been cheating on me all these years with another woman online. He was also engaged to his cousin which he always told me he was gona leave her for me but i dont think so he was planning to leave her as i feel he likes the idea of 2 wives. I informed the girls family letting them know about our marriage so the girls family decided to cut it off with him. Due to this he started hating on me his excuse is oh you did what u wanted now its my turn. I was worried about his fiance i found out there is a 3rd girl involved whom he actually loves and wants to marry her. I never accepted 2 wives with him in past i always told him its easier for me to live alone than in a life with another woman something i cant mentally handle. 

I feel he wanted 2 wives so the cousins didnt happen he decided to marry his girlfriend now. All these 3 years we lived apart as he never was interested in living with me and always had excuses i always asked for my rights he told me to wait etc. Now his family likes me and accepted me too but hes very stern on the fact he wants to marry this girl he met online. She accepted 2 wife thing for him but i truly cant especially the fact he played me this badly. I accepted it for him asking to have a child with me first or even fulfill my rights as a wife for now live with me etc. Hes saying no stay away from me for 3-4 years and i will do everything for u later once i marry that girl as well and will do my rights foe both at once. Thats a lie as currently he gives all his time to her not me. Love to her not me he never shows interest to talk or msg or give me love or concern for me even when sometimes i cry a lot telling him that i miss him etc he never cares. Feom all this i became me extremely mentally ill. I attempted suicide too many times already. But may allah forgive me now im keeping myself busy with dhikr of allah. I have left things on allah. He divorced me over the phone as well but my 3 months are not up. I recently stopped talking to him cz i get too much pain due to his bad treatment with me. So im just leaving things to allah maybe if we are meant to be together further allah will change his hesrt towards me with my duas or maybe allah has some other plan for me. Buy my question is that am i doing the right thing as a wife? Should i be talking or leave him at that and see what allah does? I get in a lot of pain i cry to allah when i miss my husband. My life is very hard i reallt dont want to be divorced twice due to my reputation and family etc. But please help me what should i do im lost ?