Family Entitlement

Family EntitlementCategory: QuestionsFamily Entitlement
Abdullah Rashid asked 6 years ago

Assalamu alaikum,
Shaykh; I have a question regarding Zina. I am confused if my parents were involved in zina or had a concubine relationship. Both my parents are Muskrikeen.

Asking my father:
Me: Dad did you ever proposed to mom?

Dad: Yes, I did propose to your mom. I was the only income and it was hard paying for everything making $5.50 p/hr. Even went to jail for no insurance cause I couldn’t pay it.
We never really made it a priority to get married with us struggling just to pay rent and the utilities. Much less everything else. She lost the engagement ring at Lake Lainer. But she really didn’t seem upset about losing it. I was hurt about it. I worked hard to pay for it. Next thing I know we weren’t getting along and ended up splitting up when you turned 2yrs old.

Asking my aunt:

Me: Where you there when dad proposed to mom?

Aunt: Yeah, your dad was living with us at the time.

Me: Did he proposed before she was pregnant or after?

Aunt: Before, they had been seeing each other for a while.

Me: So dad proposed to her then she got pregnant? Why they never marry?

Aunt: Your mom didn’t want to, your dad wanted to.

Asking my mom:
Me: When did you get pregnant after dad proposed to you?

Mom: Got pregnant with you months later. We were four and a half years together. I left him because of his father and he did nothing about it. I think he was too scared. I was with your dad four and a half years. He repays to be the second year of us being together when I got pregnant with you. It was the third year or so around November. You were born July 7th. If you are asking when he asked me to marry him that was the second year of us being together. Why these questions? Later: Pregnant 5 months after or so.

*My mother claims my grandfather made sexual advances toward her and that is why she left my father.

Based on this information of my parents relationship was it zina or a concubinage? I am asking for help on this issue as I don’t want to be basis on calling it zina or the other.

In Fatwa al Lajnah al Daa’imah (20/387)
“Unless intercourse took place within the frame with a valid or invalid marriage contract or something that may be taken as a marriage contract or concubinage or something that can be taken as concubinage. In such cases, the child may be attributed to the man who had intercourse with the woman, and they may inherit from one another. But if it was a case of zina then the child can not be attributed to the zaani. Based on that, he can’t inherit from him.”

My other question is, do I use the English version of my father’s and family name or can I use the Arabic version?

Option 1: ABDULLAH BIN MATTHEW MILLER

Option 2: ABDULLAH BIN MATTA AL TAHAN

*My son is named IBRAHIM AL TAHAN
AND I am currently ABDULLAH RASHID

I asked that a response be emailed to me.