An Atheist interested in Islam

DWQA QuestionsCategory: ReligionAn Atheist interested in Islam
Jake Haddad asked 2 months ago

Hello, 
My name is Jake Haddad.  I got into Islam years ago, and the results were terrible.  But at that time I was suffering from severe mental illness, I was too obsessed with it, and unfortunately, I got into extremist Salafi Islam, which I really regret.
 
I am learning Modern Standard Arabic right now, which will thus enable me to read and understand Classical Arabic, the language of the Quran.  And I have really gotten into reading about the lives and works of famous Muslim philosophers, such as Al-Biruni, Ibn Khaldun, and Ibn Sina.
 
Reading the Quran in English is very boring and confusing for me.  I do have a desire to read in it’s original language, as I’ve heard it’s much more powerful and conveys the meanings much more precisely, as well as having much more beauty to it in rhyming and it’s musical tone, etc.
 
I am an Atheist, and a devoted reader and fan of science.  I believe in the power of science and of skepticism.  But at the same time, I am so drawn to figures such as Ibn Sina, the possibility of reading the Quran in classical Arabic, and I do want to believe in God, in Allah, because I believe it will give me more meaning in my life, among other things.
 
I need an Imam who is like me, who is a freethinker in the spirit of Ibn Sina and Al-Biruni, who deeply appreciates modern science and is a fan of it,  and who can help me with any question I have and can patiently and wisely answer my questions.  I don’t want someone who is extreme in their viewpoints, either.  I want a very open-minded, intelligent imam who I can share and develop a connection with.